I
want to preface this writing with one non-negotiable: I do NOT believe
homosexuality is a choice. If you have
any friends, co-workers, family members, or anyone else that you care for who
have same-sex leanings, you will know that (or should). While the reasons for homosexuality have
been debated over and over, no one knows why a person’s psychological make up gives
way to this, nor why God allows this.
But it is an un-chosen path many face.
Secondly,
I want you to know that I have a partner in life who commits to read these blog
entries and give me a thumbs up or thumbs down before I ever publish them. Her
approval is critical, because I value her opinion and I trust her walk with
God. Her biggest concern with this blog entry? "This is such a
controversial topic...I don't want to lose any friends over you sharing your
opinion." The mere fact that this is a concern of hers is a strong indicator
of the dysfunction that exists in many circles of Christianity and our churches
today: "Believe exactly what I believe...no room for other opinions
because my understanding of Truth is the only one that is acceptable." I pray that our friends have room for our
questions, even if they run contrary to their beliefs and opinions.
I
just read an article about The Family Foundation, a Christian group that is
calling for 40 Days of Prayer, Fasting and Repentance for Marriage in light of
the many referendums and challenges and debates regarding gay marriage. It’s
funny how some of the media outlets have called it a 40-day hunger strike. They obviously know nothing about the
spirituality of fasting, nor the significance of 40 days of fasting.
Reading
this article prompted me to share my thoughts and questions and meanderings
regarding this hot topic. As a counselor
and minister, and as a friend, I have encountered more than a few people who
have had same-sex attractions. I’ve
seen the damage that the world has caused them, and I’ve seen the lack of love the Church has shown
them. I’ve
watched the LGBT community activists force their view onto those who have true
religious convictions. All sides of this
issue have often made me cringe when I try to comprehend it under the
umbrella of Christ’s
love.
I
have been all over the place regarding same-sex marriage. I have people from every walk of my life who
are gay and whom I love. I also have
dear friends who I respect and admire and love who stand firmly against
same-sex relationships. I have heard and
read just about every argument for and against gay marriage and practicing
homosexuality, and I am usually swayed a little each time I hear the “facts” as presented by either side.
What
does the Bible say about homosexuality and gay marriage? When it comes to many
current issues, I often struggle with the words I read in Scripture, their
literal meanings, their perceived meanings, their cultural meanings, and their
Old Covenant meanings vs. New Covenant meanings. What do I believe? Do I believe the Word I read as it is,
interpreted to me by my own life experiences and by what the Holy Spirit tells
me? Do I believe the seminary-trained
theologian, who themselves in turn have been influenced by other people who
come from completely different life and spiritual experiences than myself? Do I believe the various denominational
leaders and historical church councils who have bartered and compromised and
voted to adopt creeds and “official” understandings of Scripture and
religious dogma to suit their agendas?
Do I believe the Word as it is preached and taught by pastors who
dedicate their lives to sharing the Gospel, yet are as human and screwed up and
have the same thought processes as you or me?
Do I believe fresh interpretations and understandings of the various
Greek and Hebrew texts based on today's customs and culture rather than ancient
customs and culture?
I
BELIEVE GOD’S WORD. It’s
just that I have so many questions about who’s
interpretation I stand by, especially concerning current social and moral
issues.
A
friend recently posted a thought about our need for an “unmovable standard”. Basically, what he was saying was that there
has to be a line drawn in the sand somewhere and we need to accept the Scripture’s moral compass
settings. Otherwise, what is to keep us from accepting anything as “normal”, be it gay marriage or polygamy or something as
extreme as beastiality?
I
get that. What keeps our society from
anarchy are the laws and standards we live by.
What keeps our spiritual lives God-pleasing are the standards God has
shown us in Scripture. But (1) that
still doesn’t address the
questions I have mentioned above about how we interpret the Bible and whose
interpretation we believe, which ultimately affects what we believe about those
biblically-based standards; and (2) what would have happened generations ago
had we drawn that line in the sand accepting those biblically-based standards
that people used regarding slavery, women’s
rights, rights for minorities, mixed-race marriages, and divorce? Each of those issues were argued against
using God’s Word. And now homosexuality and same-sex marriage
are on the same burner of intense scrutiny.
Do
we Christians play buffet-style religion with regards to gay marriage and
same-sex relationships? There are more than a few directives given in the New
Testament that the church has ignored or explained away. Any Christian women out there adorn their bodies
with gold or pearls? Cut their hair? Speak in church? Any Christian men out there with long
hair? When was the last time your church
had a pot luck and invited the poor, maimed, blind and lame? Have you taken out any loans recently? You see, each of these things are
specifically spoken to in the New Testament.
No ifs, ands, or buts. Yet the majority of New Testament churches do not
adhere to what the Bible says about these.
Where is the line in the sand with these issues?
Another
issue my mind stumbles over when debating scriptural literacy and homosexuality
is relatively new in the past few decades:
acceptance of divorce and remarriage in the church. How many of our churches have faithful,
loving, giving, committed divorced and remarried people serving in them? Bible study leaders, deacons, elders,
musicians, and even pastors? The New
Testament, even Jesus’ own
words, tells us that to remarry after divorce (except in the case that the
original marriage ended because of adultery) is to live in
adultery. Therefore, if we are to follow
exactly that line in the sand that the Bible gives us regarding divorce and
remarriage, doesn’t that
mean that we’ve allowed and
accepted on-going adultery into our churches?
And if you do a simple search of Scripture, you’ll find that there are many more warnings and
statements about divorce than about homosexuality.
It
seems to me that the church has a history of reexamining spiritual truths and
standards in light of grace, forgiveness, cultural acceptance, and new
understandings of Jesus’ teachings. Is it wrong that we’ve reexamined the Scriptures that deal with
remarriage and accepted this in our churches?
Is it wrong that we’ve
reexamined the Scriptures regarding women and jewelry and allowed that in our
churches? Should homosexuality and gay
marriage be reexamined in our churches today, just as slavery was, just as
women’s rights were, et el?
I
don’t have a clear
answer. But I think I have a clear
thought process.
For
me, it boils down to this: on one hand
is belief in the literal, black-and-white reading and blunt understanding of
the Bible, without room for new interpretation or reexamination; on the other
hand is belief that is based on grace, on soul competency/the priesthood of the
believer…we each are
personally responsible for how we read and interpret the Scripture…and on the on-going dynamic
individual relationship we each have with Christ. I don’t
believe that the Bible ever changes, but I believe our understanding and
interpretations of it are ever-fluid, ever-growing, ever-changing as we “work out our salvation with fear
and trembling.”
I
guess my questions are summed up here: can the same God who allows men with long
hair in our churches also allow gay marriage? Can the same God that has allowed
women to take leadership roles in churches and in worship also allow homosexual
relationships? If the church has deemed
once non-acceptable things as now acceptable, why draw the line with this one
issue? Is that God speaking, or is it
man speaking what they want God to say?
I
don’t claim to have an
answer for anyone other than myself. In
fact, I don’t really have
an answer at all…I have a
lot of questions. However, on my own
spiritual journey, I firmly believe that not everything is as black-and-white
as some would have you believe. I may be
wrong…but I may not. However, if I am going to be wrong, I will
err on the side of grace, the side of love, and on my own personal promptings
of the Holy Spirit and interpretations of the Word. I will err on the side that casts shame and
hatred to the pits of hell.
My
eternal salvation does not rest on what I believe on homosexuality and gay
marriage. I challenge each of us to not
make someone else’s
salvation rest on that either. Let's
stop demonizing one another's beliefs, from the fundamentalist conservative Believer to the
LGBT activist, let's commit to honor one another in Christ's love, and let's
leave the judging up to the Almighty.
